Letter to My Unborn Child
(Reply to ‘Cries of the Unborn Child’)
My child,
Knives and swords can’t pierce as deep. Neither can they bleed me as much as this rips me apart. Scars me through my entirety. The anguish which is now my fate, leaves no room to celebrate your conception. The circumstances which birthed you, renders much pain. It renders much shame. Even the world’s broadest shoulders, would implode with this burden.
No, no, no! Not you. You are my precious. Innocent and pure.
But your conception is so flawed. An untimely gift, wrapped up in cruelty and abuse. Your arrival, as premature, as the one whom you desire to bear you. This world, which you look forward to, is way too tainted, to baptize your despicable step-granddad as daddy. Still, I am a babe myself, a mere infant to motherhood.
My child,
Having you would transcend all blessings. If only I had written the script. Not sitting here weathering this storm. The harsh introduction of this new stage, murders my inner being. I’m like a living mummy, waking up each day like I’ve risen from the dead.
I know that this is beyond you. So unfair and immoral to you, my poor seedling. But as my eyes run out of tears, as you slowly disintegrate from my loins, and lose the life you never had; I pray your forgiveness be bestowed upon me and that sick bastard. For this is how it must be.
You are forever mine…
Not to have and to hold, but one, with my aching soul.
Good bye my love.
Forever yours,
Mommy
